London Bridge is falling down....

wow today has come to a royally craptacular ending for me. i come home at 7ish, adam is sleeping to i wake him up (he sleeps during normal hours so i can sleep at night) anywho....he checks the messages aparently his dad called at 11 when he was sleeping and i was off galavanting around with spencer and so i felt bad cuz it was a dinner invite and i've been trying to get over to see them more often so they feel more apart of spencers life so i said hey give them a call and let them know i wasnt home and you were sleeping and re-schedule if they want. anywho his mom answers the phone and it all went down hill from there. mind you yes i can only hear his replys i dont know for sure what she's saying but it was enough to pretty much ruin my day and then some. first he told her a while back he was looking at getting a job and recently appied at kinkos...(YAY ADAM) not in his moms eyes. yes i understand you're concerned but in my opinion you dont take your concerns out on someone who knows his own condition and finally found some confidance in themselves to take steps in the right direction for them. well not his mom she basically cut him down reminding him of everything thats wrong with him and basically everything he used to be. the kid he as in highschool is not the man he is today. and i know that by reading all the things he has written and just hearing him tell me is enough to know hes different. i mean in the past two years hes made a draumatic and for the better change in himself. anyway she didn't let up at all and managed to throw in a excuse my french "FUCKED UP BITCHY ASS COMMENT" about my son and how he "was the kid that shouldn't have happend" in my mind my relationship with that woman and putting up with her is over. if he can't understand that then that is not my problem. All he said was you dont need to say that i dont appreciate that. If that was my mom you best believe i'd be screaming at her to get the point accross and then say"well then you dont need a relationship with that child" so yes in my mind rightn now she dosent need to have contact with me or spencer. i'll go over when she is at work so the father can see him but shes done. Adam even said for his sake i need to give her a chance and thats not fair blah blah blah. look for a while now i've been giving her a chance and doing things for his sake. what about my sanity? i think that i deserve to be around positive people and so i choose not to put myself or my son around anyone who thinks hes a misteak. ESPICALLY when they had a son at 16. so yes that has royally pissed me off to no end and i dont think i can just "let it go" that "kid" is my heart and soul. I'm just so tired of the bullshit. THere is so much more on top of that. From my end it sounded like if he got a job they'd put the electric bill on us too. so aparently this place is 1000.00 per month and market is 1500.00 so if that becomes the case im moving out adam can stay if he wants but im out even if he is paying it all. i just cant do or be apart of that. there was a time when then were some broke ass kids with kids too. but hey maybe its just my parents who understand/remember those hard times and help out as much as they can. i mean if you can afford plastic surgery why cant you help out a little? or at least not be the biggest bitch i have ever met? now i really know why adams fathers family cant stand her. its like adam says himself she has become like her mother. i dont know her mom but damn. my mom believes you change what you didnt like about growing up and make it better for yourself and your family. guess not everyone believes that? so yea the whole conversation i caught was about him working and how thats not a good idea and how spencer is something that shouldnt have ever happened, and oh how im aparnetly not the best person in the whole world...who would say I AM NOT THE BEST PERSON? i totally am! lol...yes i had to make myself laugh at some point in this okay? well yea i mean i dont have money and yet i try really hard with her to buy stuff i think she'll like or remind adam to make fairy drawings for her get them printed for her, send her every other daily pics or spencer when i remember to anyway, take adam and spencer over to see them when they call, i even let her "talk" to me about how we needed to rebuild our trust over some shit that wasnt even me it was adam because he didnt want to and didnt trust them enough to believe in him about some stuff. ugh...i just can't stand her. and steven adams brother is a whole nother blog. im just remembering all the things i cant stand about em'. well mainly those two. so disrespectful what his brother did but hey like i said another day. UGH! thats all i can really say....thats all for now im going to go mull my thoughts over maybe take a midnight run. i need to calm down.

Back to Kinkos and a little dissapointed.....

So I've been back at kinkos two weeks now and I have never been more dissapointed...well not never thats a little dramatic but I'm pretty bummed to be there. It's good for school reasons because I can work really good hours for me basically 4-10 or 4-11 M,Tue,and Thurs. So thats cool-n-all. But the drama is still there even if Bre is gone because everyone there makes their own. I don't really think it all revolved around Bre it all goes on because everyone there lets it. So I try to stick to my just go there to work thing. Although its hard since everyone gossips to me. I guess since I've been gone for four months people want to fill me in and it's just like well all the stuff your telling me is the same as before so nothing has changed. lol! Oh yea well, I just have to keep looking towards the future and make sure not to get "stuck" there. And i'll do that by just not going full time and taking on the other responibilities that they want to lay on me. The last thing i need is to get stuck again like with winco and not do the school thing.
Also I think my dad is really looking into this buyer position that would move my parents to Oregon. That would be great for them but suck for me. I really love having them close but I do want my dad to have a better job. One that isnt so physically demanding. And buyers are desk jobs that pay well so I guess I just have to stick with my school plan. Then move to Oregon. I told them that would be my plan to get my RN credentials and then move to where they are. I don't like being away from family since I am completlely family orientated and so it would be either there or hawaii and since I don't like hawaii much (too hott) then oregon it is. But thats if they decideded to move.
Spencer is being so cute right now watching his baby einstine and chatting up a storm! I love baby einstine DVD's I totally recommend it. Oh and if you read this emily i'll totally hook you up with copies I have two DVD box sets of these bad boys! lol...
So I have two possible three prego friends and Im getting super excited for them plus for myself since I love to shop for baby stuff and a lot of cute stuff I've seen lately is too small for spence. well my parents should be back soon with dinner from FAMOUS DAVES! yummy bbq so i better end it here plus spencer is wanting me to lay him on the floor. laters and love to every1!

Two weeks till Hawaii...

So ever since my babe was born I have spent one day at my house and the past two months at my parents. Its been great having their help and getting that extra nap once my mom is finished from work but I do miss the comforts of my house. Plus everytime I go back it feels so empty. Well we'll be going home definitly once Spencer and I come back from hawaii. We're going to suprise my grandma. It will be fun I'm sure. But I will miss having Adam sharing the night shift with me. But my parents get to re-expierience that lovely night shift with the fussy nights that are bound to happen in an un-familiar place I think.
Hmm..Whatelse. Just been keeping busy with cleaning be it diapers, dishes, bathrooms or laundry. Oh yes and for those who don't know skoodge is no longer a part of my household. He went to a shelter since there were quite a few bad habbits we couldn't break him of.
Oh and yes believe it or not I still find times to keep up with the nerd world and have fallen in love with this new game called BioShock! It's AMAZING and CREEPY! I have only played the demo but find myself wanting to play it over and over again.
Well I think I'll cut this short I hear my baby. Love to all and Take Care.